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sirmatt101 last won the day on May 23

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About sirmatt101

  • Birthday 05/08/2001

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  1. sirmatt101

    stats class pls help

    5’9 Green
  2. sirmatt101

    The Time Has Come Boys

  3. sirmatt101

    It's time for me to leave

  4. sirmatt101

    It's time for me to leave

    No matter how much I procrastinate, I gotta do this now. 6 months and 14 days ago, I joined this server once I finally got my new computer running. What brought me to the server? @Flame an old friend from our previous server. He told me one day that he joined the server and I decided to follow through and join. For a long time, I loved this server. I joined Shadow (the first day as CT I would have joined 187th but I had to go) and have stuck with them ever since. Going from @Treble as Shadow CO with @Connor as the XO, to Connor as CO, then later @Capitão as CO... it's been an interesting ride. I can't say I didn't enjoy the fun nights of messing around on servers/playing Terrarria/Cards Against Humanity/and even the karaoke. That was a blast. I went for Jedi, failed the first time, got it second. Went for EP, failed the first time, got it the second. It's been a good run. What killed my experience though? I'm gonna keep it as non-biased and as little drama as possible (There is no reason to put drama in this). What started out was my first strike as EP. The backstory was I was messing with Kenobi as Eeth Koth and they were doing some PT and didn't mind the company. I saw that someone spawned in 3 chairs and figured that spawning in a chair for comedic effect wouldn't be so problematic. I spawned in a chair, sit in it for a solid minute, then hopped into the EP planning channel to host an event. 5 minutes after, I am pulled into the HeadEP lounge and asked if I spawned in a chair. Long story short, I was striked for it and lost my chance entirely for SEP. If I'm completely honest, this was really killed my entire perspective on EP as a whole as all my hard work and dedication was now flushed away with a stain on my record. From then on, I just stopped caring for EP and lost any and all motivation. Around that time there were other EPs who started getting upset with its flaws, and I kind of jumped on that as well. We did talk to high staff about it, but nothing ever changed and has changed. I hope that @Flame and @StarCola can do their best, I still believe in you guys. Another thing that really drove me away is just the feeling of being nothing on the server. I never felt like I impacted anyone's day and made it better, and it kind of brought me down. I never felt like I made good events or good stories or good jokes. I never felt like I was someone who mattered, just another player to be forgotten and swept under the rug. If I have made your day at least a little bit better before, then that's all that ever matters. No matter what you do in life, you should always try to make at least one person's day a little better. That's my life motto, though I probably didn't do it well at all while I've been here. My History on the server: Joined January 8th, 2018; Joined Shadow the same day; Got EP Early February; Got Jedi late February; Won March Regimentals; Finished my final in March; Got Jedi Council July; Left August 22nd Personal Thanks: @Flame - I wouldn't be here without you, funny enough. This guy and I go back a long time ago. My time on the server has been fun with you, even with our ups and downs. Thanks man. @Connor - This dude decided to buy me PUBG cause he wanted to and jedi lore class. That's not even the reason why he is on here, he was a pretty fun commander. We had fun times, even changing a mission into finding the oil. @Charlie - Funny enough, the first time I actually talked to him was when he got High Council and I tried to pull a fast one on him. I don't know why, but he ended up forgiving me and we became great friends. I love this guy. @Rami - I'm like a month late, but here's my monthly reminder that you're an awesome guy (You can't escape it). Also, this dude played Wizard101 like I have and it's awesome. I'd love to talk to you more man. @DarrylKenobi - When I first met this guy, I was a youngling and I was annoying him. I talked to him a lot after and he eventually became my unofficial master. I always respected this guy and still do. Plus, I appreciate a dude who goes along with the whole Luke persona in-game; he even does the old ben voice. @TheBatWaffle - H*ck @Treble - This h*cker was the old shadow CO, the first one I ever had while in Shadow. It's been fun man, and I appreciate the support you've given me. Do me a favor, and go for Jedi Council. @Storm - The only true Anakin i'll ever love. Bye everyone, maybe one day i'll come back. Maybe.
  5. sirmatt101

    Band Camp Trumpet Hype

    Annoying freshman? I already know about it lol. They listen to us seniors partially. It’s also fun picking on them. I’d never quit cause of youngsters being them.
  6. 10/10

    1. sirmatt101


      Top 10 top 10

  7. sirmatt101

    Band Camp Trumpet Hype

    There’s a reason why woodwinds aren’t used in DCI
  8. sirmatt101

    Band Camp Trumpet Hype

    So I’ve been away this week at band camp and it’s been a blast. Got to put on my uniform for the last first time and we took pictures. P.S. Get a deep voice and more aged look so you’re not mistaken as a freshman/sophomore/junior. It happens a lot. My Family
  9. sirmatt101

    Need a Computer Expert... kind of expert

    1. No real clue, if i'm honest. 2. Yes. 3. No.
  10. sirmatt101

    I need to get some stuff off my chest

    Honestly, I wish I really could give the middle-finger a test run sometimes but it's not worth it. I already have a plan once I turn 18 to live with my friend while I finish college.
  11. I don't know what else to title this honestly. Honestly, I'll just start this by stating I'm not in a very stable condition where I'm living. It's really painful here living with a guardian who thinks she knows how to raise a teen. Anytime I try telling her a truth, she instantly claims I am lying and tells me whatever it is she thinks it was I did. (For instance, she offered to take me to the store for anything I wanted earlier today and I said I didn't want to go because I didn't actually want anything. Immediately, she says bs and says I am being lazy. Even though I work my butt off for her all the time outside by doing yard work and cleaning everything.) It's always a toss-up between whether or not I'm going to be yelled at. When she does yell at me, she'll say, "I'm not mad at you," even though she had just yelled at nearly the top of her voice for something so small. Before you say, "Why don't you go into foster care?" I would if I didn't have such great friends here and the ability to keep in contact with everyone. I don't want to be put in something that won't let you have fun and take my stuff away. On top of this, I don't ever feel like I'm really a productive person on the server. Sure I'm an EP and Jedi, but that doesn't change the fact I still feel like a low-life loser who can't do anything right honestly. I never feel like I leave any impact both with EP and Jedi and all I ever feel like is I ruin others experiences. It makes me hate myself more that I cause problems. I hope I haven't caused problems for others, at least not a lot. If I have for anyone, I'm sorry. I'm not really a decent person, at all. I never feel like I'm doing good for anyone. I try hard to make at least one person smile, but it just feels like I got too far and end up hurting someone else in the process. I really even doubt I'm funny or at all interesting, I don't feel like a comedian (even if I really try). I lost my dad at 11 and my mom at 15. Ever since then, I just want to make people happier or at least try. Lately, i've been finding myself going back to being my old self. Shy, quiet, unfunny, and not interesting. I wish I wasn't like that. I used to be bullied so much in school for my weight, how I acted, and my inability to be funny. I was the target for people to screw with. I hate it, knowing that I was hated by people and knowing people still hate me. Honestly, I want to share little bit more personal stuff. I know this might seem as a pitiful act, but I got hardly anywhere else to vent. The only place I have is my friends, but even then that's not enough. If anyone uses this as a way to degrade me, that's fine. I'm used to it. Last year, a day after my birthday, I had to go to the hospital for suicidal thoughts and near attempts. This was caused by the stress my aunt and uncle placed on me (with my guardian pushing it more) who wanted to pin so much crap on me that I couldn't handle it and blacked out. The next thing I knew I was on my couch in my room crying and my guardian coming in to shun me more. I remember sitting in my chair, wondering what even caused this crap and why this had to happen. Around 10 minutes later, 2 officers (Who were actually really cool) came in and talked to me. My guardian called them because she thought I was going to kill myself (If I am honest, I used to really wish I did for a while, but it wasn't worth it. I promised my dad I'd finish high school, and I can't let that down.). They offered to take me to a hospital and get acquitted to a mental hospital. I accepted and taken to the hospital. They kept me awake till 10 and I tried to sleep. They woke me at 12 and acted like I already knew what to do. After a bit, they took me to the mental hospital (The ambulance drivers were kinda rude honestly.) and got checked in at 3 A.M. For the next week, I had to stay there. I met a few guys who were really cool and were there both from people accusing them of being suicidal and just suicidal thoughts. However, the others were not at all ok. It was terrifying, seeing people who were in worse situations than me. I got out about a week after going in and haven't been in one since. It was quite a scary place honestly. I wish none of you have to go there. That's all that I really wanted to get off. It's a little sloppy, so I apologize. When I get on a topic, I tend to go off at certain points.
  12. sirmatt101

    Need a Computer Expert... kind of expert

    I've done that, but it continues to hit 100% disk usage and suspends my game. The 100% disk usage comes from either System, Google, or the game itself at times. I downloaded it and it says the health status is good. I'm really sketchy when it comes to internet downloads, and since the Google search of Everest home edition came up with just second-hand sites for downloading it, I didn't download it. If you can get me a link to the trial version that is safe, then I'll download it. I'll post my specs here: Processor: AMD Ryzen 5 1500X Quad-Core Processor, 3500 Mhz, 4 Core(s), 8 Logical Processor(s) Motherboard: GA-AB350M-D3H Operating System: Windows 10 Pro 64-bit Graphics: ORION ([email protected]) 4096MB ATI Radeon RX 460 Graphics (XFX Pine Group) Hardrive: 465GB Seagate ST3500312CS (SATA ) DVD/CD-ROM Drive: hp CDDVDW TS-H653T RAM: 8.00GB Dual-Channel Unknown @ 1064MHz (15-15-15-36) That's about it. Sorry for the late response. I'm not really good with specs and stuff.
  13. sirmatt101

    Need a Computer Expert... kind of expert

    Good news, I can access BIOS now that I updated BIOS. All that’s left is finding out how to fix the disk usage.
  14. sirmatt101

    Need a Computer Expert... kind of expert

    1. Already have it all updated, just not BIOS. I have GIgabyte's @BIOS installed. When I choose to update it, it only chooses one option. The option says "AMD B350, AMI BIOS, F22" which i'm more concerned that it isn't correct. 2. Not at all, all these came with my build. 3. Nope. What else do you need? And my BIOS has a curser I can use, my mouse once worked with it before we installed windows. Tried my keyboard too, didn't work.